With the NBA season upon us, I wanted to do a deep dive into some of the most creative and whacky NBA nicknames. Doing a list of the best nicknames in NBA history seems kind of anti-productive, given how iconic some of the nicknames are. Earvin “Magic” Johnson, Michael “Air” Jordan, LeBron “King” James. I mean, everyone knows these nicknames and, in Johnson’s case, I am sure that more people know his nickname than his actual name.
With the popularity and talent of these NBA legends, their nicknames are synonymous with their lore. With that being said, if you look at some of the role players throughout NBA history, that is where you get some of the funniest and most creative monikers out there. I put together a list of what I think are 20 of the most creative NBA nicknames of all time. The list is in alphabetical order and is not a ranking of the best. Let me know what I missed!
20 Most Creative NBA Nicknames of All Time
Rafer Alston – “Skip To My Lou”
Not much needs to be said about Rafer Alston, as the man was an absolute killer on the streetball circuit and the And 1 tour. The nickname “Skip To My Lou” came from him skipping when performing various dribble moves. Dribbling is hard enough and, when you add a different running motion into it, it makes it that much more impressive. Streetball is undoubtedly basketball in its coolest form. If you have never seen those early 2000s And 1 mixtapes, do yourself a favor and watch this video.
Charles Barkley – “The Round Mound of Rebound”
I am a sucker for a good rhyming scheme when it comes to nicknames in sports. When that rhyming scheme is connected to an absolute legend of the game, it makes it that much better. While not overweight by any means, at 6-4, Charles Barkley played much bigger than his height. Barkley was a definition of a dog on the court and used his big butt to clear out the paint to suck in rebounds. At around 250 pounds, Barkley was big enough to bang down low with the best of them. His uncanny ability to collect rebounds certainly earns him the triple-rhyming NBA nickname.
Larry Bird – “The Hick From French Lick”
From one legend to the next, I am sticking with the rhyming theme here. As much as the “Round Mound of Rebound” fits Charles Barkley, the “Hick from French Lick” fits Larry Bird. Maybe the exact opposite of a player than Rafer Alston, Bird was in fact a hick. I mean, based on looks, Bird had no business playing in the NBA, but his humble beginnings in rural Indiana paved the way for one of the greatest NBA careers of all time.
Jon Brockman – “The Brockness Monster”
While Jon Brockman was a dog while playing for the University of Washington, he was much less than that in the NBA. Playing just three seasons in the NBA, Brockman is probably more remembered for his trick shot video than his play on the court. Either way, throughout his career he picked up the nickname “The Brockness Monster” which is probably due to the Loch Ness Monster rhyming with his last name. The idea that you never see the Loch Ness Monster and in turn never saw Jon Brockman on the court, The Brockness Monster makes so much more sense.
Fred Brown – “Downtown Freddie Brown”
While the theme of this article has to do with creativity, there is something cool about a precise and simple NBA nickname. As the three-point line was introduced into the NBA, no one took to it quicker than Seattle Supersonics guard Fred Brown. In the first season that the three-point line was adopted, Brown shot 44.3% from downtown, giving him the nickname “Downtown Freddie Brown.” Much like Dr. J, Air Jordan and King James, the simplicity of “Downtown” partnered with how cool the NBA was in 1979 makes this a top-tier nickname.
Bob Cousy – “The Houdini of the Hardwood”
“The Houdini of the Hardwood” is kind of the “Magic” Johnson nickname before Johnson found his way to the NBA. While he is probably a little overrated just because of the climate and opposing talent that he played against, there is no doubt that Bob Cousy is a legend in the game. Much like Pete Maravich, Magic Johnson and Rajon Rondo, Cousy was known for his crowd-pleasing and exciting dribbling. The hardwood is already an incredible nickname for a basketball court and Houdini is one of the best magicians of all time, so for Cousy to adopt the moniker is pretty cool, if you ask me.
Glen Davis – “Big Baby”
Glen Davis is one of my favorite basketball players of all time, and that comes from his incredible time at LSU. Nicknamed “Big Baby”, I had originally thought that the nickname stemmed from being compared to Shaquille O’Neal while in college. But when I realized that Glen Davis was 6-9 and 280 pounds, it made a lot less sense. Davis’ nickname actually originated from one of his coaches calling him a big baby when he would cry after being bullied when he was a kid. I like to think of it more as a baby Shaq moniker, which is incredible when a role player is compared to an NBA legend.
Kevin Garnett – “Big Ticket”
Kevin Garnett is one of the most underrated NBA players of all time. The definition of a dog, Garnett was known for his strong defense and intensity for the game. He had an incredible offensive game and could probably play any of the five positions on the court. Given the nickname “The Big Ticket” by Sam Mitchell, Garnett would attract huge crowds of fans to watch his games, from high school all the way through the NBA. Physical tickets have of gone by the wayside, which kind of sucks because tickets in general are a great souvenir from games. Even today, Garnett is called “The Big Ticket” and, given his impact on the game of basketball, it certainly fits.
Paul George – “Pandemic P”
After naming himself “Playoff P”, Paul George was given an unfortunate nickname when the world went into lockdown. First of all, unless your name is Shaquille O’Neal, giving yourself a nickname is just downright corny.
George, who at the time of the pandemic was one of the most polarizing players in the NBA, was an MVP candidate. At Oklahoma City, George averaged 28 points per game on 44% shooting. That was until he was matched up with the Utah Jazz and Joe Ingles. In all honesty, George probably got the better of Ingles, but if you are even in somewhat of a rivalry with a guy who looks like a plumber, then you already lost. Anyways, George struggled when it came to the bubble and the haters went nuts, substituting “Playoff” for “Pandemic.” The nickname became even more immortalized when O’Neal called George “Pandemic P” on Inside the NBA.
George Glamack – “The Blind Bomber”
This is just an outrageous story for a nickname. Playing in the 40’s, George Glamack was a star at North Carolina, scoring 45 points against Clemson. He went on to win the MVP of the season in college basketball. What makes it even more impressive is that he was this good of a player while being blind. Yes, actually blind. Due to his near-sightedness, Glamack used the lines drawn on the court to know where he was. Allegedly, Glamack did not know where he was on the court and would use his depth perception to shoot. While Glamack was only in BAA for one season in 1948-49, being blind and playing professional basketball is crazy.
Darrell Griffith – “Dr. Dunkenstein”
One of the most underrated players in NBA history, Darrell Griffith was a dog while he was at Louisville. Averaging 18.5 points per game in college, Griffith could score from all over the court. What was most impressive about him though was his ferocious dunks. Griffith came into the NBA with a 48-inch vertical jump. His athleticism was off the charts. He was a great shooter as it was, but his dunks made him instantly popular.
Representing the Utah Jazz in the 1984 and 1985 Slam Dunk Contests, Griffith earned a great NBA nickname of “Dr. Dunkenstein”. First of all, that’s just an incredible nickname. And second of all, anytime you can combine a basketball play with an all-time villain in Frankenstein, it deserves a spot on this list.
Tyler Hansbrough – “Psycho T”
As a North Carolina fan, Tyler Hansbrough is one of my favorite basketball players of all time. As an undersized center, we knew that his paint dominance in college was not going to transition well to the NBA. And while this was true, he took a different approach to his NBA game. Instead of using post moves, Hansbrough went the route of instigator and enforcer. While he did gain the nickname in college, “Psycho T” really came out in the NBA.
I best remember him for his time at Indiana with those teams that went toe-to-toe with LeBron James’ Heat. There was not a fight that Hansbrough didn’t want. No matter who you are, I do not want to mess with a player nicknamed Psycho. It also kind of reminds me of Psycho Pete from It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.
Ersan Ilyasova – “Ghostface Ilya”
When I was doing research for this list of creative NBA nicknames, I came across Ersan Ilyasova and his alleged nickname of “Ghostface Ilya.” First off, I am a lifelong Milwaukee Bucks fan and have seen Ilyasova play for my team three times. Second off, I have never heard anyone call him “Ghostface Ilya” before. Either way, being named after one of the greatest rappers ever is incredible, considering that Ilyasova is a lanky white guy from Turkey. But hey, Wu-Tang Forever.
Vinnie Johnson – “The Microwave”
Coming off of the bench and providing instant offense is an incredible role in the NBA. We have seen players like Jamal Crawford, Lou Williams and Jordan Clarkson thrive in this role. Those players owe that to Vinnie Johnson. As a part of the Bad Boy Pistons, Johnson was instrumental in giving Detroit back-to-back championships. Coined by the great Danny Ainge, “The Microwave” was really a great nickname for someone who could come off the bench and heat up in a hurry.
Damon Jones – “The World’s Greatest Shooter”
The best thing about the NBA is that these are the athletes with the biggest egos in the world. Whether it be the number one player in the league or the 15th guy off the bench, everyone in the NBA thinks they are better than everyone else, which is consistent with Damon Jones.
While he was an okay player in his younger years, Jones came into the spotlight on the 2004-05 Miami Heat championship team. Coming off the bench, Jones shot 46% from the field and 43% from three. While these numbers are certainly above average, they are nowhere near “The World’s Greatest Shooter” numbers. And that is what makes this nickname that much better. The absurdity to call yourself the best shooter in the world in a league with Ray Allen, Tracy McGrady and Paul Pierce is just peak NBA.
Bill Mlkvy – “The Owl Without a Vowel”
As a child of parents who migrated from Slovakia, it makes sense why Mlkvy has quite the unorthodox nickname. Going through life without a vowel in your last name is kind of crazy, especially when you see that he was a dentist in the army, serving in the Korean War! It is easy to make the rhyme too with this nickname, as owl is a great for vowel. Then you realize he went to Temple, and “The Owl Without a Vowel” sounds like one of the best nicknames in NBA history.
Ruben Patterson – “The Kobe Stopper”
Ruben Patterson’s nickname kind of goes hand in hand with Damon Jones; a role player with an ego giving themselves a nickname so outrageous that it is awesome. On his own, Patterson was a solid NBA player. As a second-round pick, Patterson was able to stick in the NBA for 10 years, averaging 10.7 points and 4.2 rebounds per game. Then came the nickname.
This is one of those NBA lore stories, who knows how much it could have changed, but the legend goes that Patterson gave himself this nickname after playing well against Kobe Bryant in practice in Patterson’s rookie year. Another story says that Shawn Kemp gave Patterson that nickname. Either way, Bryant averaged 29.3 points, 6.7 rebounds and 4.8 assists against Patterson’s teams in Patterson’s career. Bryant only shot 44.4% against those teams compared to a career 44.7%, so maybe Patterson was on to something?
Kristaps Porzingis – “Tingus Pingus”
The Knicks flat-out sucked towards the back end of the Carmelo Anthony’s tenure there. After he was injured in early 2015, the Knicks spiraled. That resulted in the fourth overall pick in the 2015 NBA Draft. In a class with Karl-Anthony Towns, Devin Booker, D’Angelo Russell, Myles Turner, Jahlil Okafor and Willie Cauley-Stein, it was thought that the Knicks were going to get a young piece that they could partner with Anthony when he got back from injury. The Knicks went and fooled everyone though, taking Latvian big man Kristaps Porzingis. In a now famous video, Knicks fans boo’d the pick endlessly, including this Knicks fan, leaving us with one of the best NBA-related viral videos of all time.
Brian Scalabrine – “The White Mamba”
During his career, Brian Scalabrine became synonymous with the end of the bench guy in the NBA. While he did not play many minutes late into his career, Scalabrine was a very popular player due to his personality. As a fan favorite, every time Scalabrine came into the game, it was electric.
During his time in Chicago, Bulls fans coined him “The White Mamba”, which of course was a play off of Kobe Bryant’s famous nickname. As has been the case with numerous nicknames on this list, using a much more talented player to aid in your nickname gets bonus points from me. Comparing Scalabrine to Bryant is just funny, and credit to Scalabrine for being such a great sport about it.
Andrew Toney – “The Boston Strangler”
While serial killers are horrible, they do get dubbed some interesting nicknames. In this case, Albert DeSalvo went around strangling 13 women in Boston in the early 1960s. Now, that is horrible, but it did give way to an incredible NBA nickname.
In the early 1980s, the top dogs in the NBA were the Boston Celtics and the Philadelphia 76ers. With their close proximity and history from the ’60s, this quickly grew into a rivalry. And as every great rivalry has it, one player rose to be the difference maker. In this case, it was Philadelphia’s Andrew Toney. In Game 7 of the 1982 Eastern Conference Finals, Toney gave the Celtics 34 points and overall averaged 26.4 points in that series, thus being given the moniker “The Boston Strangler.”
